Bananasarethebest

Relationships with the opposite sex is tricky! We know that we have boundaries, but sometimes, we are just really confused if our actions are still “inside the boundary” or not. We question if our treatment of the opposite sex are still honoring God. 

I like how Heather Paulsen asks herself these three questions whenever she is dealing with the opposite sex:

1. Would I be treating him this way if his wife is here? (for the guys: Would I be treating her this way if her husband is here?)
2. Would I be thinking about him/her if I were married?
3. Would I be saying this if my husband/wife were here?

When I first read that, I was mind-blown. I realized that even if I am single right now, I am promised to just ONE man. Even in my early age, I must think ahead and see that playing around with emotions is not an option for me. First, it’s tiring and hurtful, and secondly, because someone out there is waiting patiently for me! I want to start serving and honoring that person by also patiently and actively waiting for him. 

She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. Proverbs 31:12 

It is so explicit how the woman of noble character is described in that verse! The woman brings her husband good, all the days of her life! She didn’t just start when she knew who her husband was, she started waaaaay before she even met him. 

Anyways, I hope those three questions helped and will help you in dealing with your relationships! :)

If you have any questions, ask it HERE.

Was encouraged to post in a groups in FB, so I wrote this down again. Now, focused on my relationship with my dad and the other people I met. 

“My earlier life was a mess. 

I wasn’t really close to my dad. He’s very moody, proud, fickle, and maybe I just don’t really understand him the way I understand my mom. He’s very strict with me, and I lived a legalistic childhood of forced obedience without understanding why I was doing what I was doing. I often times fail him, so I felt unaccepted into the family. Parang lagi nalang akong MALI. I have three brothers, but they also don’t talk to me unless it’s about an argument. So when my mom left for work in manila, I felt very lonely(we were living in davao that time). At dahil hindi ko mahanap ang acceptance na hinahanap ko sa bahay, I looked for it at school. Sa school ko, I was very very active! I was in the dance troupe, I worked hard for good grades, I tried hanging out with the coolest people, etc. Pero kahit na sikat ako sa school namin, I didn’t make lots of friends. Actually, ang pangit ng reputation ko sa school ko. I realized na sa sobrang galit ko sa tatay ko, na-transform na ako into the same person that I didn’t want to be—proud, fickle, and moody. Sobrang maldita ko lang, to the point na takot ang mga tao na kausapin ako. I made a lot of enemies. I felt unaccepted sa bahay at sa school. Parang kahit saan nalang walang may gustong maging parte ako ng buhay nila. Kaya napunta ako sa “barkada”(with quotations kasi pa bago bago ang sinasamahan kong barkada. Para akong social butterfly na walang permanent place). Sa barkada, natuto ako ng mga bagay na sana hindi ko natutunan. Nagpatuloy yun hanggang college. I learned to smoke, to drink, and I did that EVERYDAY. Sa umaga, late ako sa class. Sa gabi, pupunta sa party, iinom, at mag-good time. But even though I did all that, I felt so lonely and empty inside. I had a barkada, but they were just there pag iinom na. Wala akong masabihan ng mga tunay kong saluobin ng hindi nag-woworry na I will be judged and looked at with disgust. 

Then I met ate Ysa. I was a loner(remember, masungit at moody at pangit ugali ko nuon kaya walang lumalapit saakin), but she approached me. After nun, kahit na masungit ako, she treated me with love and patience. Tapos siya pa yung nagsasabi sakin kung pwede ba daw niya akong makasama kasi she likes my company. Iniinvite niya ako mag-dinner dates, mag-kwentuhan, etc. Nagulat ako, syempre! First time ko kasi magkaruon ng taong gusto akong makita at gusto ang aking presence sa buhay niya. Then one Friday night, sabi niya kain at kwentuhan daw kami sa isang lugar malapit sa school. Umokey naman ako, pero sabi nya may dadaanan daw muna kami. Habang naglalakad papunta sa place na “dadaanan lang” naming, nakarinig ako ng loud music! Sabi ko, wow, baka party! Tas pagdating ko sa luob, ang energetic ng mga tao! May mga sumasayaw, may mga kumakanta. Then I looked sa lyrics. SHOCKS NASA ISANG YOUTH SERVICE PALA AKO! I don’t like being invited to “religious” gatherings kaya talagang sobrang nabigla ako nun. I wanted to go out, I was panicking, pero I just froze there looking at the lyrics of the songs. But then came the preaching. At the end of it, I was crying buckets of tears. Nung na-realize at na-understand ko fully kung anong nagawa ni Lord sa buhay ko, I felt so liberated. Pinakita ni Lord saakin na yung ACCEPTANCE at LOVE niya, hindi ko kailangan i-earn by doing “good stuff”. Hindi rin yun nababawasan tuwing hindi ko siya nasusunod or pag na-fail ko siya. Yung love niya para sakin, complete and free, because of Jesus. If I ask of Him, He is willing and able to fill every area of my life that I think is empty or lacking. With Him, my joy can be complete. 

That truth led the start of the revolution of my life. I was a changed person. But ofcourse, si God, laging may little surprises para satin. One of the first few things that He told me to do was to ask for forgiveness from my dad. Ano daw, ansaveh? I will ask for forgiveness from a man that hurt me? It wasn’t easy and I was struggling. But God taught me how to forgive, just as he has towards me. So, I called up my dad and asked for his forgiveness. I said sorry for hurting him, for disobeying him, for disrespecting him, for doing things that made his life harder.. and many more. With a heartful cry, he replied with a “hay salamat anak. Ok na yun. I love you no matter what.” After that conversation, I felt like a lot of baggage on my back was lifted and everything was so light. Si God lang talaga nakakagawa niyan. 

Now, I am a 5th year student, graduating next year(YAY!). God changed me, little by little, ever so patient. God also taught me how to be a friend to others, and how to keep friends and your relationships healthy. I now enjoy biblically sound friendships, and I enjoy sharing this joy with others. I now have this great mission to share this joy and freedom with others, so that they may also taste and see the goodness of our Lord. :) 

“

I opened, by chance, my folder containing one note entries dated a year ago. I was surprised when I read it. But more than being surprised, I was more blessed. I couldn’t remember the emotions evoked to me at that moment, and I guess the same emotions could not be reproduced anymore. That’s why I was really glad when I saw this! It’s dated October 5, 2011.You should read it first before I move on:

Word for today:

Luke 24:31, 45

Kakamatay lang ni Jesus dito at third day na. He was with them in the road to Emmaus, but they didn’t recognize Him because they were eaten up by their problems . They focused so much in their problems na kahit anjan na si Lord sa harapan nila, they can’t enjoy his presence! How sad! Minsan ganyan ako. Lord, I am sorry and I repent of this. But in luke 31, it said “Then their eyes were opened and they recognized Him..”

It is not because I study scripture or because I’m full of wisdom kaya ako nakaka-alam kay Lord. It is He who opens eyes. He was the one who revealed himself to me and to the apostles that’s why we are able to recognize Him.  Sa verse 45, sabi dun “Then he opened their minds so they could understand the scriptures” GRABEEEE. Si Lord talaga ang dahilan kung bakit may alam ako sa scriptures! Lord, I pray that your word may be revealed to me and that it may be planted deep into my heart. I pray, Lord, give me my daily bread of you. I thank you because you continually give me these things because of your love. Thank you!  Thank you for your love that enables me to walk in this life free and hopeful, complete and not lacking in anything. Thank you Lord, for the wisdom that you are giving me. I do not doubt it Lord, your grace supplies me with unlimited wisdom. <3 Thank you Lord! :) 

Wow. I could feel the joy and enthusiasm that I once felt when I read that scripture! I feel nga na super relevant niya saakin, kasi as of the moment, I have a lot of things to do. When you’re busy and focused on your work, you can’t let your emotions get a hold of you. Kaya nga problema ko yan, busy na nga ako, emotional pa! Kalurks!

Kaya imagine, how cluttered my mind and my heart is! Oh, how more cluttered are the pieces inside of me yearning for love, sustenance, consistency, and peace! But how should I manage to go back to God if I have an urgent paper that would spell a lot of trouble if not finished? If every moment, another paper and exam pops, how am I supposed to go about finding peace?

But then, it hit me. A painful rock staggered through my brain and exposed those intentions that I myself do not know about. 

I’ve put my academics before God. Instead of seeing too much academic load as the distraction that hinders me from enjoying my relationship with God, I saw it the other way around. It is painful to admit, but in my innermost being I have categorized Him as the distraction from my academics. 

This, my friends, is idolatry at its best. Idols in this present time don’t come in the form of wooden dolls and clay statues anymore. It’s in the form of things that we consider as greater than the One true God. 

How pathetic of me! I know ‘pathetic’ is too strong of a word to be used, but how could I not describe myself as such before I realized all these? Could my academics save me from the eternal fires of hell? Would it be able to give me true and lasting peace, joy, and love? Will it ever die for me, because it wants me to be reconciled to itself?

No, no, and no!

There is no other god that would die for me just so that I can be reconciled to itself. How I wish my grades are reconciled with me! But grades are just grades. At the end of the day, it’s just an imperfect evaluation of one’s knowledge and hard-work.

But when everything has been said and done, when everything crumbles and returns to dust, Jesus remains. His love for you and me remains. 

This truth returns me in perspective. Everything is arbitrary with respect to Him. And I am so thankful that even though my eyes were once fixed on things that are temporary, He, in His great patience and mercy, focused my eyes on that of which is eternal. 

And so, today, I repent of this things and consciously choose Him before all things. 

“For everything, absolutely everything, above and below, visible and invisible, rank after rank after rank of angels—everything got started in him and finds its purpose in him.” -Colossians 1:17 The MSG

It’s so hard to be faithful sometimes. Good thing that even faithfulness is something given by Him. Everything comes from Him. 

Ahh, what a reminder to depend on Him and not on myself! Thank you Lord! My weaknesses are strategically placed in my life so that I can witness your perfect grace working through my insecurities and situations. 

So blessed to have an awesome and cool God like Him. :)

I’m forgiven, because You were forsaken.

I’m accepted. You were condemned.

I’m alive and well, your spirit is within me!

It’s all because You died and rose again.